what to do

Curiosity is one of my weakest link. Sometimes I want to spank myself for being one. I can't deny that I've been through a lot of troubles coz of this. Sometimes I hate but sometimes I enjoyed it.

Adventurous? Well, it depends on the situation. But most of the time no, but I just got carried away by the flow. Which is sometimes good and most of the time bad coz I got into situation I don't really like. A friend of mine teasingly told me that she thought I was the adventurous type when I screamed about something I'm watching that I will never dare to do it. Which made me think, do I look like the kind of person who likes adventures? Maybe when am into my rebellious mode and being too elated over something.

Where am I getting? Well let's just say like this. One day I'm so hungry I opened my drawer and  found two chocolates. One is plain milk chocolate from a known brand and the other one is white chocolate with nougats from an unknown brand. I love the milk chocolate one but I've been having it regularly that if I keep on eating the same thing, sooner or later I'll get fed up of it. Yes it taste very good but it became boring as 1. it's plain 2. am always eating it 3. it's always there. While the white chocolate, it's like I'm having a second thought as I haven't tried it before. It's been there for a long time but I keep on ignoring it coz I don't know the brand and I may not like it. But curiosity strikes. I'm bored and what's wrong in trying something new? So I taste it. It's not super good but it taste good. The bad thing, I want to try more. Coz I'm trying to prove something. Looking on something that may surprise me. Question is, is there really something surprising hiding in there? Or am just wasting my time?

Okay, I know I'm talking nonsense now. I'm just having a week full of chocolates. Different kinds of chocolates from different parts of the world. And I'm so loving it. And at the same time, they were all just given to me.

Honestly, my real point right now is am so confused. Confused with so many conflicting things. I can avoid if I wanted to but I don't why am not. I'm still asking myself if I have the guts to talk to him about my soon to be decision. Well, I haven't decided yet coz the other one is not yet confirmed. And now I can't focus on my work. Maybe I should stop it. Stop hallucinating.