Saturday, December 28, 2013

happy holidays

It's been a long time since the last time I post something here. My bad.

Been busy with the festive season plus had hectic days at work. Been working like hell as now starts the high season aside from the fact that due to Erlyn's resignation, work load had been reshuffled and that means more additional work for us.

I received the email confirmation last week but just replied to it today. This is it. There's no turning back. Let the flat hunt begin!

Spent the Christmas with Blesie and the Ritz gang. Seriously, am gate crashing somebody elses party. But it's fun to meet other people.

But the weather now here changed. Much colder that you need to wear jacket when going out. When we attended the mass which was held outside the church, we almost froze as the wind is blowing to us. Talk about goosebumps.

Went to the mall for these two days of my off but didn't managed to bought anything except for one perfume.

Also, went to premier house last Thursday to visit them and gave their gifts. I confess am guilty that I just bought random chocolate gifts for Gab as I can't decide before what to give to him. Hope Anna and Jaq like my gift to them.

I dunno but I'm feeling excited, scared, worried for some reason. My anxiety is building up. Am still having second doubts with my decision. But I'll stick to it. Life's a gamble, and I'm taking my bet.

Thursday, November 28, 2013


The "now" moment that I cannot properly think nor decide the correct thing to do.

I'm not sure if this is what I really want. Weighing the pros and cons is not helping me at all. Maybe coz deep down it is what I really want though there's still part of me that won't let go of my so called "comfort zone".

Is this the correct move I should do? Coz seriously the cons are more than the pros yet it's like am convincing myself that it is still better to move.

Help, I need some serious help to decide.

Monday, November 18, 2013

the sign

This may be a bizzare and stressed day for me.

Earlier this morning, I received a funny call from Blesie greeting me with the question if I have a boyfriend. I almost rolled out laughing coz it's unusual for her to ask such question but she said she was serious but soon end up laughing. I got curious only to find out a more surprising news.

I asked for a sign, and I think this is the sign I'm asking for. 

Then the other is trying to call me, several times but I didn't answer it. Soon got an email. Now my brain is being fried as to how to respond to their email. 

Why now? I mean, this is so surprising. Am having this mixed feeling of emotions - surprise, proud, confusion.

I'm already at my comfort zone. But is this enough for me?

I need to make a decision fast. But hopefully I will make the right one.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

please pray for philippines

I don't have anything to give, so the only thing I can do is to pray for everybody who got affected by the disastrous typhoon.

Indeed Philippines was not that rich, but people strive to live inspite of everything. But when the only few things they have were taken away, only prayers to keep their faith stronger is the only way to survive to this.

Honestly, it breaks my heart everytime I see nor read the news. I know the most amazing trait Filipinos have is being a survivor. I do hope and pray that everything will be okay. 




Btw, I did attend a training this afternoon. As expected from me, I sort of blank out and didn't understand a thing about the training. Afterwards, Leon asked me about it and am actually totally clueless since I didn't listen so I kinda invented something to tell him. I can see the confusion in his face so I search the topic and found out that I just told him something out of this world. No wonder the look in his face, I'm so embarrassed. Actually, my mind is flying somewhere coz I'm thinking about that email. I haven't replied to it but I need to. Sooner or later I need to make a decision. To go or not to go.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

back from vacation

Been MIA again as I went for a short vacation in Manila for two weeks.

Yup, only two weeks. So bitin! But what to do. I'm just glad that I got the vacay spot so I can see my sister.

Two weeks went by so fast. Unfortunately, this is not the good season there. When I arrived, it was raining cats and dogs. 

Good thing we cancelled our Cebu-Bohol trip otherwise we experienced the 7.2 magnitude earthquake. I feel sorry for Bohol as that earthquake caused a lot of damages especially to the tourist spots and even to the residents there.

Even our Vigan trip was cancelled due to my sister's condition. Anyhow, we changed it to a day trip to Las Casas Filipinas in Bataan. A very very nice place. 

Where else I went to? Hmmm... Villa Escudero were I had my tantrums so I don't have a single photo and later on went to Hamilo Coast with my friends.

So yesterday morning I still can't get a good grip of myself that I have to pack and went back here. Since I have this bad habit of last minute packing, as usual I forgot a lot of things. I bought this especial dried tawilis in Tagaytay that I forgot to bring. And I was even looking forward eating it. I just remember it in the middle of my flight. Even my fave neck pillow was forgotten as my mom was holding it on our way to the airport. Found out today that my sister brought it along with them home. Now my ube pillow is on his way to Canada. I don't think I will see him again. *Sob sob.

And I wasn't able to buy all the things I needed to buy. Wasn't able as well to visit all the places I planned to go (mostly malls). I had so much things that I wanted to do but I don't have enough time. Aside from the fact that I got sick during the last few days of my vacation.

Btw, today is my especial day. Unfortunately, I'm just spending my day alone in my room as I feel too sick to go out though if I wanted I can go but I don't know what might happen to me.

so long bakasyon, I need to go and get back on working my ass of.

Friday, October 04, 2013

my birthday wish

Wahahaha... Feeling like a kid and wishing for some birthday present this year.

I saw this one months ago but was too busy to go out and look in the stores.

Then one time, by chance we passed by in electronics store and saw this:

actually, the one that I saw is not HK but in pure pink color

It's actually not expensive nor cheap, but when I saw a HK one in the net, I got berseck. I told myself, am gonna have this included in my wish list.

Although having camera in which have memory that you can store pictures in your drive, this one is also nice as I can use the pictures in the collage project am planning to do.

I'm going to get this, before the end of this year.

Thursday, October 03, 2013

the things we should be thankful of

I had my first lieu day today. Just to do some things that needs to be done once and for all.

While on the bus on my way home, I suddelny remembered the conversation I had with my friends a few days ago. We were sharing our experiences we had here in Dubai and we realized how lucky we are compared to other Filipinos who are here as well.

First of all, when I arrived here, I already had all the comfort I can ask. A good accomodation, transportation, food and company. I never had problems with getting my salary and benefits. I never experienced being in bed space like those other people who needs to share a room with 4 to 8 people (there are more extreme numbers in some stories that I heard) with one toilet so there's a strict toilet schedule for everybody (heard that if you missed your time, you have to suffer). And I was talking a room here, not a flat.

Even when I moved in a new company and got promoted after a year. I have my own room. With attached toilet. The living room is decent. We don't need to pay for any utilities expenses except for the internet.

Our accomodation have it's own gym, internet room, laundry room, tv & games room and swimming pools. Most of the basic needs you can find here. From job band 8 to 10 (10 as the lowest), there are only two people to share a room. Most of the companies are not like this. If you're on lower job band, then you have to share the room with few more people. Yet these colleagues always find a way to complain about so many things. When you look in those aspects, we should be thankful for the management as they were trying their best to give almost everything for the staff.

Back to me in the bus today, halfway through my journey, I overheard two people talking about almost the same thing. They are getting a gross salary (meaning no free accomodation, transportation & food - actually all these benefits were normally offered in hotels and some companies) and got a notice that they need to look for a new room as the one who's renting the whole flat didn't pay the building owner for months. So even if they were paying on time, someone was using their money on other things and doesn't reach out the owner. Sad isn't it?

Then while waiting for a taxi in front of Deira City Center, a fellow kabayan asked me if I knew some certain address as I guess that they were job hunting. I told them to get a taxi so the driver can guide them there. Apparently, they were on a tight budget so they cannot do that. He said he only have AED50 and doesn't want to spend it on taxi fare. My eyes suddenly avert to the bag am holding - I just bought a sushi/maki set worth AED38 and cheese snacks for AED10 for my merienda which almost the same price for the budget of that person for the day. I feel useless for not being able to help them when they were looking helpless that time. As I look at them from afar, I thank god that I didn't experience things like that. Here in Dubai, I only once attended a job interview (in person) and that was for the current job am having. 

Well, Papa Jesus,I just wanted to thank you for all the things. There maybe some unfortunate events but I believe that everything happens for a reason. If it will come, it will come.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

weekend weekend

Atleast my weekend is quite fruitful.

Yesterday I went out to meet Jackie and Mike. It's actually a joing celebration of Mike and his friends and they rented out a two bedroom suite at Marriott Marina so we went to there to meet him. The food was unbelievably good I'm so full I want to explode.

Today, me Renz and Julio went to to Outlet Mall to buy some knick knacks. Well, after so many hours of going around circles, I managed to buy a pair of shoes (for office shoes), some shirts and a jumping rope. Well, I think I'll be ready now for my vacation.

I finally managed to check on the Instax polaroid camera I've been dreaming for so long. I never thought that it will be cheap, maybe I need to save money once I got back from vacation so I can buy it. I so wanted to have a instax camera. Waaaaaa... Although it is still much better to have another camera where I can save the pictures and post online, this one is just like for fun. 

Come to think of it, I almost forgot to pay for the internet. Good thing I got reminded by someone.

Two more weeks and I'm off to work! Vacation here I come!

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

dead me

I'm so tired I lost my appetite to eat.

Currently am swimming with my work I want to shred all the papers in my table.

Had to extend big time today so atleast my work for tomorrow will be lessen.

This is me right now...

And what irritates me to no end is that when I got home, the A/C is turned off by these buggers housemate of mine. Ampf!

I wonder why I can't keep my mouth shut coz earlier the guard was saying something to other people while I was asking for some maintenance form and I got curious so I ask why. She said that it's no longer allowed to bring home uniforms. Then she asked me, idiot me said it's my uniform so she got my name, staff number and flat. Whatever.  As if that can stop me.

Anyway, my brain is not working anymore. 

Wednesday, September 11, 2013


Finally got my ticket back home. And to my surprise, they got a direct flight for me. Woohoo!!!

Unfortunately, I'll arrive there at night and I'll be back here at night as well. Well I know they're going to pick me up in the airport there but arriving at night means I lose one day of going around. I really have limited days there so I want to maximize it as much as possible. Unfortunately, I can't change the dates anymore and I'm afraid that if I will complain with the flight timings, they will give me shitty flight instead.

I know this sucks to think but since I don't expect someone to pick me up from the airport back here, I feel bad going home at night. Travelling alone in the taxi when I can't even think to close my eyes coz I'm still afraid that the driver will drop me somewhere in the middle of the desert (yes, our accomodation is located somewhere in the desert, wtf)

And the most annoying thing  is that I'm gonna spend my birthday all alone. Although I do hope that someone with a big heart will surprise me, I know it's not gonna happen. Why did my birthday have to be on saturday and not friday? :( :( :( 

And my box is still in my room. Guess I'll be gone and back when it reaches the destination.

Tomorrow I need to do again a 10-15 minute training. I seriously don't know how did I become a trainer when I suck in that department. Honestly, I hate training. Though I can do it one by one, doing it with several people is a different case. I tend to get shaky and nervous. And I tend to forgot the things I always wanted to say. And tomorrow it's with the whole team. I'm so nervous I want to call sick.

Wednesday, September 04, 2013

fun day

I had so much fun today. The whole finance team went for bowling and this is the first time I enjoyed playing bowling (maybe coz am little lucky today that my scores were not that low?) and everybody had a good time playing. Sorry for those who didn't come, they miss all the fun.

Also, eventhough it's only the start of "ber" months, I already bought my Christmas gifts to my friends. I'm thinking whether to wrap them or leave it as it is. My gifts for my frineds in Manila am sure am not gonna wrap coz I'll still need to put them inside my luggage. Am so excited to give it to them. I hope they will like it. But am still undecided which one to give who. I bought seven for the meantime for my girlfriends and for my guy friends, maybe later on. Ohhh.... super excited.

Btw, lately I'm waking up at 4am which irritates me to no end. And coz of this, am having headache. Not a simple headache but super headache that I need to take medicine for it. Am so looking forward for vacation.

Tomorrow's the last day of the week. At last!!!

Friday, August 30, 2013

sickly weekend

I'm terribly sick since yesterday. And I hate it.

When I woke up yesterday morning, I felt that I already got the virus coz my body is not feeling okay. I tried to be alright for the whole day but it turned worse when I attended that presentation hel by Network coz I felt suffocated in the back office and it clogged my nose to no end. Prishy was there and she was saying something to me but I can't seem to understand her so I'm just saying yes to everything she says (hope nothing important that needed a "no" answer). Even the guy from Network kept on telling me something but my brain refuse to process such information so I guess he thinks it's useless to talk to me. Well, I couldn't help it. Then when I came back to the office, I forgot to remind them regarding the info that Makram wants to pass them (felt guilty but it totally slipped out of my mind coz I'm concentrating on during the whole training not to sneeze and sniff).

Then found some arabic sweets left by Mazen in my table. Afterwards, had a little birthday celebration in the office. Had to hide in the back coz my nose is crying non stop and I had to stuff tissue to it. And I lost my taste buds (not literally) that time that the chocolate cake taste like bitter cake, wtf!

Went home shivering so I just decided to eat some noodles while watching "Die Hard 2". Man, Bruce Willis still does have hair! I sort of got addicted to "Die Hard" I watched all the series and had to pay AED20 to watch the last series on tv. 

Back to being sick, the thing I hated being sick is that first of all, I don't have any stock of medicine at home. I found some but it's for cough. And currently I only have cold and flu and I don't want to take medicine that it's not for cold as my body has this stupid habit of getting sick when I took a medicine especifically for that certain illness. I took once a medicine for cough eventhough I only have fever and later on got cough for some reason. Also there was a time am having pms that I don't have mefenamic acid I took the medicine for lbm the next thing I know I really got lbm. Then there was time as well that I can't sleep and someone from the clinic gave me a medicine for anti histamine that will make me drowsy and help me sleep but when I took it, later on my allergies came out I became itchy I can't sleep for the whole night. So now am becoming a bit cautious of the medicine that am taking. Whew, what a hassle.

My body really feels heavy and my fever is not going down. But I don't have a choice but to do my laundry (I regret for being lazy last week and skipped doing laundry). I only did one batch coz I'm feeling dizzy. Cooked some pasta for lunch coz am already starving to death. 

I almost regret also volunteering to go to the office tomorrow but I think I need to anyway to get some medicine in the clinic. I need to take something as my cold and fever is getting worse. Times like this, I can't be lazy coz nobody will take care of me except for myself. It sucks to be alone.

Right now, my nose is so stuffed it makes me hard to breath. I need yo sleep early coz I woke up very early this morning (I first woke up around 4am coz I heard my flatmates were chatting or cooking outside then I woke second time around 7:30am - the usual time I wake up every morning).

Hope my condition will be okay tomorrow so I can finish work early then I can pass by quickly in the supermarket to grab something to eat. I don't have enough supplies in the house now. Living alone really sucks!!!

Saturday, August 24, 2013

being upset on weekends

I'm pretty upset.

It's a hair issue again. You see, after 15 days of coloring my hair, I applied the color reactivator to my hair (as per instruction, it will reactivate or enhance the color I had on my hair). Thinking this might be a good chance to have a pure jet black hair, happily applied it and did everything as per instruction. Since I finished late last night doing it, I went straight to bed sleeping with wet hair. And caught cold the next day, ampf!

So today, I excitedly checked my hair on the mirror. And to my grimace, seems like there were parts of the old reddish brown color still there. And I can visibly see them now (am hoping it's just my imagination). And I asked myself, why? Did the color reactivator reactivates my old color that were not colored by black? Waaaaa....

Anyway, I cooked spaghetti yesterday. I wasn't able to manage the measurement of the ingredients and I end up cooking a lot of sauce (it's good for more than five pax) so I may end up eating it for a whole week. I already ate it for two consecutive days but it seems like there still a lot. Well, what to do. Atleast all I need to do when I come home at night is to cook pasta and reheat some sauce.

I can't wait for October. Am so excited to see my sister and brother in law. And of course all my family in Manila. I miss eating homemade dishes. I miss eating Filipino foods. I miss everything that it makes me feel homesick just thinking of it.

Saturday, August 17, 2013


Oh my god, am so proud of myself. Was managed to sort my wardrobe after soo long. I mean, the last time I fix my clothes was a year and 7 months ago. I know I know, it's been quite sometime but I kinda been so busy I don't have time to do it.

But found a lot of interesting stuffs like two brand new towels (been planning to buy for months), guess it was given to me when I joined which is more than two years ago and a lot of dresses that I haven't worn (most of them are from H&M, didn't notice it though).

And this weekend, my version of tom yum goong was a total success. Am really proud of myself. But deveining the shrimps was a nightmare. I almost throw up while doing it. Unbelievable.

Hmm... So I drag myself to watch some tagalog movies out of boredom but it seems like a total waste of time. All of them are crap. This is the reason why I'm not very fond of watching them.

Got allergies attack again coz I bought green mangoes and bagoong last thursday night. And then I just ate shrimps. Bagoong, shrimps and fish sauce were not my bestfriend so now am itchy all over my body. Have to eat a lot of chocolates to counter it.

Anyway, gotta go. Need to work again tomorrow.

Wednesday, August 07, 2013

hair prob

I seriously wanted to scream.

You see, I had this wonderful idea of dyeing my hair on my own. I've never done that before but since I thought it would be too simple to do, I tried my luck.

After long hours of washing, coloring, washing and drying, I was too excited to look in the mirror for the result. To my grimace, it's not that well even. There's still some brown left on my hair. But the roots and ends were perfectly colored, how come the body of my hair were not? Waaaaa...

I'm not sure what to do, am thinking to buy a new set of color to color my hair again but looking back of the hassle I went through, maybe I'll just bear having two tones for now and go to some decent salon when I have time.

And I was too excited and happy to have a super jet black hair. My hair was not naturally super black. It's black but not that black. So the thought of having one will be good since a lot of people were colouring their hair in either brown or something a bit different from their original hair color. But it turned out like this. Soooo sad.

Anyway, what's done is done. Now I've learned my lesson not to color my own hair.

Btw, it's confirmed. They saw the moon already. So it's a long weekend, yipeee!!!

Happy eid mubarak everyone! :D

Friday, August 02, 2013


I'm so worried I don't know what to do.

The hardest part is that I'm far away from them I'm being ignorant of what's happening there.

I don't know what to do. And it's eating me up from inside. I don't know what help I can offer nor any consolation. 

Why I feel like being useless in times like this?

I think it runs in our blood. So I'm not the only one.

And I need an outlet for this. But I don't know who I should talk to. And me myself is in current shaky situation.

Haha... Funny, maybe I'll get crazy first here.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013


Okay, am currently so broke I want to die.
Am so waiting for the next salary, which is unfortunately quite late for this month.
Geez, one more week and two more weekends and I’ll be back to normal. Good thing it’s Ramadan so it’s not worth it to go out as most of the restaurants were closed plus it’s already super freakin’ hot outside.
Now I’m wondering how we are able to enjoy ourselves at Yas Waterworld last week in this heat. They had this hotelier promotion so we got a big discount. Though am expecting a lot of rides, we did enjoy it as we tried almost all of it except one (the scary one where you will be put in a capsule like ride and drop you on a very long slide). I used to be a scaredy cat but since Silvester was too excited, he drag us to all rides (except for what I’ve mentioned earlier).
But I always had fun whenever I go visit my friends in Abu Dhabi. It’s like am so free whenever am with them I can do anything. Maybe coz all of us are spontaneous and we do everything out of the moment without prior planning (I suck in planning ahead of time). Then Silvester loves to cook so I don’t get hungry whenever am with them and we can sing non stop as he have his own karaoke while Blesie loves to chat non stop and we were like crazy for talking about everything - even the stupid ones and she tolerates my bratty side so it’s fine.
Too bad they were now very far from me. 

And our flat will soon be inhabitat by those people whom I can't get along with. Cathy is moving out this weekend so I keep on praying that the ones who will  replace her in her room will be much better (though one of the friends of first room already ask me before if she can move once Cathy is out and I say yes coz am pretty drunk that time). Haay, people really come and go.

Anyway, let's see what will happen next.

Saturday, July 06, 2013

what to do


You see, I was suppose to do four SOPs today so I can pass it tomorrow but I can't concentrate on thinking about SOPs I ended up reading manga and watching movies. And now it's already late night and I haven't started my second SOP. Think I'll never get the allowance again this month. What a shame.

But I seriously wanted to have it done and submit it by tomorrow as I really needed extra allowance this month. Since I went for that vacay and I still have to pay for something and I have to go again for vacay on Oct, I badly needed extra money.

Come to think of it, it's not all about extra money. I also feel that coz of my negligence, I sort of disappointing my manager for not doing my homework properly. It's started last April and up to date I didn't do anything.


So I had "this" chat with Jacky last time. Somehow, it feels good to let out something that's been bugging me for quite sometime. It feels good to be with my real friends. They somehow brought back the warmth inside me.

I don't need to justify myself to other people, coz I normally let them think and say whatever they wanted behind my back. But it still bugs me a bit coz I'm being judge unfairly.

To you, you know who you are, this will be the last time I'm gonna write or mention you in this blog. Stop talking behind my back coz it's not fair that I can't defend myself and people are judging me based on your stories. If you feel that I treat you badly, think it twice. Stop being a pathetic person. But knowing you, I seriously don't care if you can't shut your fucking mouth. I know you love to talk, you fucking love to tell people about everything, even those things that you should keep to yourself only. I'm almost regretting getting close to you and I take back unblocking you.

That's it, now all I need to worry is to chase some sleep.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

so far

Nowadays I'm getting addicted to this one manga that the story is quite disturbing. I actually found it in the manga site when I click the option "surprise me". This came out and at first I was hesitant to read coz I'm not a fan of stories like this. But of course, my curious side kicked in and I read the first chapter. So now I got hooked with it though the story was too disturbing. I wan't suppose to write it here but I need an outlet otherwise I'll get disturbed even more.

It's kinda weird. But I'm enjoying this weird story. Does it mean am weird too?

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

am back

Yes, am officially back from my two weeks vacation in Europe.

Unfortunately, I don't have the copies of our pics as we only used one camera and when I attempted to borrow the memory card, she refused to lent it to me (maybe scared of me losing it). So this will be just a super long wordy post coz I need to write everything before the details fade in my memory.

So here it goes. Our journey starts in Greece.

We originally planned to stay for 4 days, unfortunately I bought the wrong ticket dates so we adjusted it to just three days.

We were supposed to have a long ass connecting flight but when we arrived in Cairo, we kindly asked the desk if the morning flight is not full and can still accomodate us. Luckily, flight is not full so they manage to squeeze us in the early flight. Whew!

So we arrived early in Athens than expected. Taxi fare is around EUR50 wtf! That's around AED250!

Anyway, we arrived safely in our hotel and was amazed by the oh so big room of Intercontinental Hotel considering it's not an executive room yet but only deluxe. We requested a connecting room so Blesie and Rahyan got the twin room while I got the double room and connecting door was kept open so it's like we're in just one super big room. I liked the room and toilet as it's super spacious but too sad as I cannot watch tv as you need to pay for it plus wifi connection was like EUR8.50 for one hour! Nothing is free in this damn hotel. Wtf!

Anyway, we immediately explore the city and went to Acropolis right away. Went there by walking and almost died under the excrutining heat of the sun. Structures were amazing and roam around to take pictures in every possible angle. Hah!

After that, went to the shopping street and got crazy for all the restaurants and lots of stuffs! Bought a few souvenirs coz I'm still in thrift mode (which later I realized is such a wrong move). After that had an authentic Greek dinner but not amazed by their pork souvlaki as am the kind of person who loves flavorful foods. But their salad is a must. Veggies were freshed plus the dressing is to die! Super love it. I think I'll start to eat more salad if salads were this good.

Anyway, it's a long day in Europe now and it's already past 9pm but it looks like it's only 6pm. But we need to head back to the hotel now as we're tired from the flight as we don't have sleep from day before (have to extend in the office up to 9:30pm to finish last minute work then crammingly pack my things and later realized it's already 1am and need to catch the 2am bus).

Second day is just city tour. Then last minute we decided to go to Santorini. So we bought the flight and boat tickets even if it's not in our original budget.

taken from my mobile, too bad it's a bit cloudy

Santorini is a yay! Am so happy to be there though a bit sad coz weather not cooperative that day and it's cloudy and windy so we didn't enojoyed the cruise tour we bought as we can't swim in a cold and windy weather (they also went to a deep part were only well experienced swimmer were encouraged to swim and let us amateurs go look and sulk!). Also went volcano trekking and we were not dressed appropriately, had to buy a shawl as it's windy and am wearing a sleeveless and very short romper (which I used the shawl to cover my lower half otherwise people behind me can see my ass). Tiring but not really satisfied coz I felt a day is not enough to enjoy Santorini. Didn't manage to see the sunset. Another sad thing was that I lost my favorite shades *cry*.

Next journey - Italy!

Easyjet was such a shitty airline. Flight was delayed three times so we arrived in Rome super late (instead of arriving 8:30pm, we arrived 1:30 am). Rooms given to us by Marriott is not connecting room so next day we just occupied one and got extra bed instead.

got this from Rahyan's fb - our pathetic shot sitting on Vatican corner

Early morning went to Vatican and have to wait for a very long time so we can see the Pope giving message. There's a large crowd coz it's a special sunday. After staying long under the sun, rain suddenly showered on us so we were like wtf!?. Anyway afterwards, caught by a fellow kabayan who invited us in their nearby souvenir shop to buy some stuff. Bought rosaries for my family and friends (almost died when I pay for it coz it's so expensive) then went for lunch. Authentic italian spaghetti, pizza and salad is to die! I almost cried coz spaghetti was so super delicious, we were imagining we were relieving the moments in the movie "eat, pray and love". After that went back to Vatican so our rosaries will be blessed. Had to queue and squeezed ourselves to get inside (got stopped by security as I'm wearing skort above the knee and they are not allowing ladies to go inside the church with bare knees - so had to wrap my cardigan around me). After that, had a very expensive ice cream coz we only went to that ice cream shop for the free wifi. Then missed our bus back to the hotel so we had to catch a taxi instead.

Second day went around the city to tour. We missed the bus again going to city so we went by taxi. Heavy traffic so had to pay a lot for taxi fare. We opt to walk around coz they look so near in the map. Walked to every tourist spot we could find in the map and at the end of the day, we were dead tired. Never walked so much in my whole life. But we were able to buy ice cream in the blockbuster shop called "Old Bridge". Their ice cream was huge! Love it!

Third day went to countryside as suggested by our guide/driver Marco. Had a nice but short trip so evening we went out to hunt the first restaurant were we ate the oh so delicious spaghetti but failed to find it so we eat in a different one with a different taste :(

Fourth day is such a waste coz this was supposed our flight going to Paris but when we found out that our flight was cancelled due to strike, we went to train station and attempted to buy a train ticket only to find out that it's also on strike. No choice, we decided to extend our stay in Rome and have to buy a new ticket (even if it's not in our budget) going to Paris coz if we're just going to rebook our original ticket, we will not have time to roam around Paris even for one day and we are really desperate to see Paris and if we're going to rebook our ticket to Amsterdam, it's much more expensive.

So we decided the next day to go to Florence instead of Venice as tickets going to Venice was quite expensive. Took a guided tour but was not able to explore the whole Florence. It was so hot and passed by in those authentic leather shops and almost died coz I really want to buy a lot of authentic leather stuffs but too expensive for my wallet (especially that  leather jacket *sigh*). So only bought a gift for my Pop and another bag for me. Also on our way, our bus passed by on some shops selling hand made stuffs. Bought some super delicous white chocolates and was too tempted to buy this 12 year old balsamic vinegar coz its so delicious but was too expensive and too big to squeeze in my already full luggage.

Next morning we have a very quick breakfast (super love the pork sausage and bacon) in the hotel as we don't want to miss the hotel bus going to airport this time. Got it in time for our flight. :)

Next journey - France!

It's colder than I expected and my cardigan is not enough to warm me. Trip to hotel was a challenge as airport is way too far to the city and hotel to take taxi, also all people were using metro with or without luggages. As you know, Paris is an old city and thus their metro subway. No escalator or lift (maybe there is but we just didn't see it) so we have to carry our luggages up and down all the way. And since their metro are all interconnected, it's a long journey before we found our right train. Once we arrived in our hotel (locationwise - good; roomwise - too small but already forewarned before that most rooms in Paris were small), we immediately head out as we only have this day to roam around Paris. We passed by first to buy some jacket and tights for me coz am already freezing. Also bought the day and night tour of Paris so we can save time in going to all the places we want to visit. Badly wanted to go inside Louvre coz always wanted to see it (especially when I got the copy of Da Vinci Code) but queue was too long and it will take all our time *cry again*. Passed by in Louis Vitton shop and there's a long queue outside. I was like, wtf! Building structures were amazing, I was left in awe. Eiffel tower at night is amazing. I was like a little girl giggling underneath it coz before I only saw it in pictures before but now I was there. Even if my lips were starting to get purple due to cold weather, that didn't stop me from posing for pictures.

 Far shot from Louvre coz we just hop off from the bus

Next morning was another challenge for us. You see, we can't buy the train ticket as machine is only accepting coins and we were like beggars asking every single person passing by to change our money. Location was somewhere far and no nearby shops were open yet and no taxi is passing by. We're in a panic already as we may miss our flight. A very good samaritan took pity of us and gave us all his coins so we were able to buy the tickets going to airport. In the airport, we are literally running. It's like we were in amazing race that we have to push away people in our way if necessary, did self check in but still need to queue in line to drop our luggage. KLM already announcing our names as we are the last ones to board the plane. Good thing we still made it.

Last journey - Netherlands!

Once we stepped out of airport, I died. It was freaking cold! Even if am already wearing the jacket I bought in Paris, it feels like am not wearing anything. It was freezing cold, wind was so strong and it's raining. Am literally not prepared for this weather as all the clothes I brought were shorts and light shirts (except for the tights and jacket bought in Paris) and the longest one I have is the 3/4 pants am wearing. I'm even using my neck pillow as wrap for my neck as I was about to freeze to death. Good thing our hotel have a shuttle bus so we arrived safely in the hotel. But I love Netherlands. I fell in love with this country. Of all the European countries I've been to, this is the friendliest one so far. And their English was so clear we didn't have any problem communicating to them. Not once I have to repeat myself to them (in Paris it's so terrible. People will still speak to you in French eventhough you told them that it's English only - with please).

From Rahyan's fb again. Bottom photo was supposed her solo pic but I photobomb it thinking she will not notice it, hehe

We arrived early in the hotel so our rooms were not yet ready. They are offering us not connecting rooms so we decided to wait and roam around outside. Bought a 24 hour bus and boat tour and took the boat tour first. Went to Amsterdam Central and bought a leather jacket on discount (but still expensive) coz I couldn't take it anymore. Got excited for the tulips bulb that I bought for my mom, couldn't wait to go home on October to give it her so she can plant it. Also saw Anne Frank house but couldn't get inside coz the queue was insanely long *sob*. Later on told by Amie that you have to be there very early for the queue. Then later in the evening, we meet Blesie's old friend Amie and had a nice evening.

Next day we took the bus tour and was able to roam around Amsterdam. Still feeling cold despite wearing two shirts and two jackets underneath, everytime we see a sunlight we were running to it to get some warmth. Also went to some kind of countryside to see the windmills. It such a nice thing to feel the serenity of their countryside. It's so peaceful there. Originally planned to go to red district but I sort of became not feeling well so we decided to go home instead.

 windmills are on the other side of this but I like this side coz it looks peaceful

Next was back to Dubai. Have to borrow Blesie's bag coz I can't close my luggage anymore. To think I didn't buy that much. Sadly, I forgot to buy a souvenir for Gab. Want to cry when I realized that inside the airport *sigh*.

Hmmm... I think above already sums up my little escapade. I'm not really prepared for this trip coz I didn't expect the weather in Paris and Amsterdam so I have to spend money buying clothes I may not use in the near future. Thinking that we even consider side tripping to Switzerland, I'll die in cold there.

Overall, I enjoyed our trip. Though the weather in Europe is not suitable for me coz I've got beakouts all over my face, neck and back, dry skin, blemishes coming out on my skin, sunburn (still have the marks of my sandals in my feet), bruises and frizzy hair, still worth it. I just wished I have more money and more time otherwise I so super enjoyed it to the max.

On the other note, I just remember this tipping incident I had. While in Cairo going to Athens, we went to this toilet and the lady who's cleaning it was bit chatty (though she keeps on talking on Arabic but we sort of understand her through gestures) especially when I wet myself by this stupid faucet so I have to dry myself in the dryer. As we were about to go out, she was literally asking for money or tip. We look to each other and told her we don't have Egyptian money with us. She looked at us very disappointed and we were like, wtf! She didn't do anything yet she expected a tip? What the hell. And same thing happens again when we were in Cairo going back to Dubai. When I found out that there's not tissue inside the cubicle, I asked her for some since she's holding the roll of tissue. Speaking to us in Arabic inspite of us talking to her in English, I think it's a bit rude of her.  After washing my hand, she hand me again a very few pieces of small tissue to dry my hand and later on open her palm to me demanding for some money. Seriously, what is wrong with this place? Why are service people so openly ask for money? If people want to give tips, no need to ask for it. If she approach me nicely and gave me ample tissue that will satisfy my needs, I may consider handing some euro coins to her. But no. I don't like rude people and she looked down on us like we were some kind of stingy asian. Grrrr...

Now back to reality, I don't have anything to eat in the flat except for the chocolates I bought in duty free earlier today, I think I'll sleep again after this as am too lazy to unpack my things.

Friday, May 31, 2013

today - updated

As much as I hate to admit, but I tend to lash out when am mad. And I can't help not to do it otherwise I'll go crazy.

I sort of sometimes wanted some attention and affection (ksp lang ang peg) but most of the time, people misinterpret it and totally left me alone. The exact opposite of what am expecting. And too bad am not that good in expressing myself.

Sometimes I wonder when did I become so slow to know things. Am I really slow or I just don't care to look into details?

I remember when I was a kid, my mom bought us coin banks. I like the one given to my sister so I asked her to exchange it with me. She doesn't want to and I went berseck and I lash out on everything. When my mom found out about it, she destroyed my coin bank (in which now that I think of it, it is much cuter than hers coz it's more like a glass in violet color) and I was left with nothing. That was the first time I learned how to value what was given to me no matter what it is and be contented with it. 

Hmmm... The other other night am so so mad I was supposed to throw momo in the garbage chute. I was about to open the chute when I looked into him and suddenly remembered how happy I am when I first have him. And looking closely, I saw that he was all dusty and dirty. How he got ignored for so long, I dunno exactly. Tears welled up in my eye and I felt stupid standing there with tears in my eyes and a bear in my hand. In the end, I couldn't do it. Eventhough a lot of people saying he looked scary coz he's black, I still love him. This is an exemption in my lash out moments.

Today... I spent my whole day splurging my precious money. It was way too late when I realized I shoudn't do that. I should be saving for my vacation. But I'm way too stressed over so many things I dunno know whats the right outlet to release it.

I'm losing my appetite and my allergies are coming out like crazy. Very good timing, just when I was about to go for vacation that I had this irritating allergies on my body. Grrrr...

Bought this pineapple orchid scent that makes my room smells yummy. I don't eat pineapple yet I like the smell. 

Saw this very cute romper but is way too expensive and out of my budget. And because I bought a gift set perfume, I kinda regret not buying the romper instead of perfume. :(

Hope wen can finalize our flight. Fingers crossed.

Since my mind is on somewhere else, I bought the wrong date for our flight. After paying and everything, I found out that it's a day earlier than our original plan. I want to slam my head on the wall. And if am going to change the dates, I have to pay almost quarter of the original amount that I paid. Good thing Blesie was able to get a new booking for our hotel and I just adjusted the dates on my side.

Haay... Such stupidity is unacceptable. What the hell is happening to me?

Wednesday, May 29, 2013


In serious trouble finding flights :(

We already found our hotels, thanks to Blesie's boss coz he was kind enough to look for us for the last missing one. And I already cancelled all the unnecessary ones.

Problem is, am not familiar with the cities and airports nearby. I think my talent in searching stuff is long gone as my patience is running out now!

Help... somebody help me...

We're actually don't have enough time now as this trip is next week already. We only have few days to finalize this.

And now I only realized that after this long trip, I will have 4-5 free extra days as we will be back on 18Jun13 early morning. So what am I suppose to do with my free days? OMG! I don't want to think that I will be trapped in the flat that long coz am sure am already broke to go out. Waaaaa... Somebody please adopt me or good enough to accompany me during these days. Such a waste! I suddenly missed those days when I can ask someone to accompany me.

And I'm feeling so sleepy now just when I needed to do a lot of research. :(


On the other note, went to Jackie's birthday dinner last night. Such a nostalgic place to visit. Funny thing, a guy (I totally forgot who he is) told me how come he didn't see me for such a long time. Just told him that I already resigned long ago. Ahaha..

Now I feel guilty for my gift to Jackie coz I really don't have time to buy some present plus am in a saving mode (so I can't spend my money right now). That gift is actually for someone I told that I will give plus the other souvenir I bought but ends up not giving it for various reasons. I was actually surprised to see it in my drawer in the office coz I thought the last one in my flat is the one I save for him but turns out I brought the other box to the office in case I see him before. But since things turned out ugly, better not to waste it. Hmmm... Well, it's a life saver. Instant gift. Aheh.

My so called diet was so mess up coz there's always something coming up to spoil it. Today they announce the lateral move of Prishy so we have a chocolate mini party. I ate so much chocolate (actually it's not that much but since am in a diet, it's already too much) and actually hid some more in my drawer for tomorrow. PG lang ang peg, hahaha...

Thursday, May 23, 2013


I guess am not going to buy nor eat that noodles again. Coz it's a very lonely noodle.

You see, since I foresee that my evening will be as boring as hell, I decided to pass by at hyperpanda to buy some food to eat. When I got to the noodles section, I saw a lot of new flavours I wasn't able to control myself I took a lot. Now I can survive in two weeks with my ninja food!

But this chow mien was a meh! It makes me sad I can't help my tears not to fall from my eyes.

Recently my weekends are becoming boring as hell. Most of my friends are busy with something else they don't want to hang out with me anymore. Haayz... I called several people today but either they were busy with other things or they don't want to go out at all. And I really super hate to force someone coz I hate begging somebody else time. And when I feel rejected, I'll never ever ask again for the same reason.

Actually, if I really wanted to, I can still ask other people to go out with me. But the problem is, they need to have super long patience and jolly attitude as I tend to shut up for a long time. Especially nowadays. So if they don't know me, we will end up not talking to each other for the whole time.

I really really hate staying in the flat during my off. It's like a prison for me. And it sucks out my energy.

Back to the grocery, I was roaming around not knowing what exactly what I wanted to buy. I saw bitter gourds and was about to buy them when I remember that I don't have any pork to partner with it. And saw some squids but I don't know how to cook them. Coz aside from being lazy, am not really a good cook. And that sucks!

Okay, as much as I hate to admit it, I do miss it when somebody else is cooking for me. Now all am eating is canned foods or my ninja foods. Meh!

But I bought a lot of sweets and chips that will keep me company in the nights. As you can see, even if am in a diet (which I cheated again tonight), I can't sleep at night if I didn't eat a bag of chips or chocolates.

I opened my closet to get something when suddenly most of my clothes fell on the floor. Great! Now everything's in a rumble. No wonder I can't find most of my shirts, I think it was buried somewhere in my closet. But am too lazy to sort and fold them. Such a troublesome work.

I suddenly remembered last night how I end up laughing my ass off coz of the latest manga chapter of Naruto. It's super bitin. But I really got excited for team 7. Hmmm... I want to write a letter to Masashi Kishimoto to write and release the new chapter as soon as possible as my anxiety is now on it's boiling point. Weee...

Anyway, so much for now. Need to get back watching some old series.
Tata for now!

I realize the screaming pain
Hearing loud in my brain
But I'm going straight ahead with the scar...
                                        ~ sign by flow ~

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

what's up

A lot of people were asking me what's happening to me nowadays. Not that there's something new to me, but I guess they were wondering that I do kind of acting weird.

Okay, okay. I have to admit now. I'm sort of in a strict diet. 

I was able to restrain myself not to eat rice for four days. Unfortunately, my body gave up and I pig out with rice dinner tonight. Big time!

Eversince I got the visa, I was decided to lose weight, in any possible means. 

But to my grimace, nothing's happening. 

On the other side, I'm improving my water intake. Nowadays, am drinking atleast 7 glasses of water! What an accomplishment.

But my sleeping habit became worser than before. I really can't sleep at night. I even moved my bed location to get a different vibe but to no avail.

So I normally have to wake up late and run to the bus. I always have 20-25 minutes only in the morning to freshen up. So people, now you understand why am barely awake in morning and try not to get in my way otherwise you will be the victim of my fury, hah!

Seriously, my body is just moving automatically in the morning that sometimes I'll just realize am already in the hotel ready to start my work. 

I don't even remember how long I took my shower or how many sprays of perfume I had before running to the bus.

And worst, most of the time I don't recognize the faces of the people I see in the morning especially in the lift. No wonder a lot of them think am such a snob. But am not! Am just a sleepyhead.

Uh oh... I think I over ate again and am feeling numb. Waaaaaa....

Friday, May 17, 2013

the vacation application drama

For the past week, I've been in such a grumpy mood due to my vacation. First, I can't decide last week whether to submit my vacation application or wait for a few days since I still don't have the result. But since I have a backup plan, I decided to apply for a month. Only to be rejected by my manager.

I was sort of disappointed back then coz I'm thinking that if my plan a fails, my plan b will be in trouble. And it was on our vacation plan before that if I will not take May-Jun vacation, I'll take the whole month of June (which I think everybody forgot about that deal). I willingly let go of the idea of going the second half of May because of work reasons. Then to my grimace, my June vacation falls on the same time as my manager (!) and he asks me if I can cut it short from 30 days to 17 days so I'll be in the office for month end. Since I can feel that my plan a will work, I said okay. But actually, am not happy with that idea coz I felt it's unfair if I'm really truly going home. After that discussion, I pulled out my form as I need to revise it but didn't submit it on  the same day even if he was asking for it. He went to my table and asked if I'm okay and if am okay with it. Well, I just say yes and didn't say anything afterwards.

Two days later, I received my passport. Voila! I got the visa already. I got so excited but I still need to wait until Blesie and Rhyan will get theirs as well. That time, I passed my revised leave application form and this time it's only two weeks. He was surprised to see that I changed the date and asked why. I said I changed my mind about going home.

Afternoon he approached me again and asked out of curiosity whats happening. I sort of lost a little bit of my temper and I told him that with 17 days is unacceptable, it's not enough to go home. Travelling back and forth already counts as 2 days and considering the airfare and everything, it's not enough. He agreed to my reasoning and promised me that next time, he will approved my one month vacation.

This morning, brother in law was chatting with me about vacation. I thought they were just still planning about it. Then it turned out that they already bought the ticket for October. I was like "wtf!?!?". I mean, I want to see them. It's been 7 years since the last time I saw them. The whole time I can't focus on my work and I keep on thinking about October vacay. So after lunch, I made up my mind and approach him. I asked if it's possible for me to have a short vacay on Oct but it overlap Sandra's vacay for a week (my fingers were crossed that time). I can tell that he's in a bad mood that moment but I still tried my luck. He was quite upset with me for the reason that he made it a rule before that no two people should take vacation on the same (but always ends up having two staff getting the same vacay). He said no and he said if I want November or December, he will give it to me. At that moment, I got sort of emotional so I said no and turned my back on him. I think he saw my disppointment and he said fine and hand him my form and he will sign it. I just nod and took my toothbrush kit and head to toilet as tears were now forming in my eyes.I know he have a point but still, it's in the middle of the month, there are other people in our section. When I'm in that state, I can't think properly. All the reasonings became blurred to me. So in short, I sort of cried in the toilet coz I felt it's so unfair. I feel like he doesn't want me to go to vacation. Last year he only allowed me three weeks! Geez...

I think I spent too much time in the toilet coz I waited till my eyes turned back to normal. Right after I came back to my table, I saw his email telling me to pass my vacation as he will schedule now all the vacation for 2013. So I spoke with Sandra and asked her if she can move her leave in September so on October, ours will not overlap. She made a new form (although the first one was already signed) and I hand it over to him together with mine. Well, in the end he sign my vacation. And I couldn't get any happier than that.

Right now, am getting more excited for my October vacation than my June vacation. 

Friday, May 10, 2013


Friday and I'm in the office. Can you imagine that? My precious friday, my long awaited off, yet am in the office doing some work I wasn't able to do yesterday.

And now the day's already finish. Such a waste.

I super duper hate going to the office during my off days. It pisses me off to no end.

Yet, I still do sometimes when I want to finish something. I mean, this habit is very unhealthy. But things will be different as soon as Erlyn's back. I can breath.

Lately I've been in a very very bad mood for no particular reason. Haay...

Anyway, am so anxious to know the results. Coz I couldn't decide what to do unless I got it. 

Am torn between my two decisions. And time is running out.

Seriously, I wanted to go home. For vacation or for good, that is.

Though there are times that I still enjoy the freedom of being alone and single, there also moments when I feel vulnerable for being one.

I mean, I don't have a problem being a single. Actually, I love it. Single in a sense of not having a partner.

But being alone is different. Having away from my family and close friends have so many impacts to me. I'm not a natural loner. I tend to go berseck out of boredom if am alone. And I tend to do a lot of foolish things.

I miss my family. I miss Jimi. I wish I can still hug him when I come home for vacation.

And worst is that I'm beginning to lose interest (again) in my work. The "secret" effect didn't last that long. 

But am too lazy to look for a new job. And the crazy thing is that I'm thinking of starting to look some openings back home. I feel like I want to spend more time with my mom and pop.


Saturday, April 20, 2013

I know I've been MIA for quite sometime but even I couldn't fathom the reason why. Maybe lack of inspiration to write or am just to lazy to think of any. Yet am back in whining.

It's already 11pm and I need to sleep now. But it's so hard. I hate this feeling.

Lately I feel like being away from everybody. It's this moment that I feel so stressed I don't want to see anybody nor go out of my room. Even simple chitchat doesn't interest me at all.

All I wanna do is crawl under my bedsheet and watch some Naruto Shippuden videos. Yes, am currently very addicted to it. And I seriously dunno why.

I lost my appetite. My eating habit for the past three days is terrible. No wonder am having some tummy ache today. What a bummer.

Anyway, I think that's it for my whining today.

Friday, March 08, 2013


I've been living in a dream world. In a fantasy.

I always thought that things will go on my way. That if I wanted something so badly, even if they were not suppose to be mine, I can get it if I will work hard.

But I was wrong.

Yesterday while sitting in that table, I suddenly had an epiphany. Things became clear to me. And I cannot do anything about it anymore but to accept things as they were. 

All I need is to move on.

But how?

I already shed a lot of tears. And I told myself that time that I'll cry as much as I can because that will be the last time and I will never cry for the same reason again.

Surprisingly, tears won't fall in my eyes now, even if I feel that am hurting again because of the same reason.

I should be happy, but I'm feeling empty.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

left behind

Okay, so my other two flatmates will soon leave.

Cathy just sent me a message that she decided to move to a new flat today or tomorrow since she already got promoted and she doesn't like her new roommate.

Arlene already resigned and will only stay until the end of this month.

So that left me with the other two new flatmates and soon there will be too more. What a bummer.

I should say I don't care, but I still felt this pang of loneliness inside me. It was always hard for me to get left behind. Maybe am so used to leave behind people that now people are leaving me behind, I got sort of affected.

Before in this flat, it was me, Blesie, Erlyn and Cathy. Then an Indonesian came and then left afterwards. Then Arlene came. But so Blesie resigns. Erlyn decided to move with Marj when I got promoted. Then Arlene resigns. Then Cathy moved to a new flat. Why do I have to get left behind? :(

I just hope that my soon to be flatmates were ok. Non smokers, non drinkers and no boyfriends hanging out in the living room.

:( :( :(

Friday, February 08, 2013


Wow! I couldn't believe it when I checked my stats for my readers and saw that there's a high percentage of readers that came from Russia and Poland! I wanted to tell it to Sandra (my Polish colleague) but decided not to as I don't want to talk about my blog in the office. 

Recently I like the atmosphere in our section. I'm having fun chatting with Sandra and Shamli. Seriously, I don't like those awkward moments that you cannot chat freely with your superior, so am just happy that we are like this. I'm not sure if am being a good leader to them, but I still hope that am guiding them corectly.

Hope we can go out altogether again. We used to go out, go to clubs or hangout somewhere to have a drink. But now, we all went separate ways. Or maybe that's what I think.

I think it's a wrong move for me to delete those messages coz I just remembered how stupid I became. Am thankful I moved on. But one thing pops in my mind, did I?

Just finished watching Superman Returns, Casper, Twilight - New Moon and currently watching Mama Mia. Oh I love Pierce Brosnan!

I wasted my whole day doing nothing. Was supposed to go out but suddenly felt lazy and decided not to go.

Btw, my dreams of going to Acapulco was shattered after reading the shocking news about the massive gang rape happened in one of the resorts. Imagine, six spanish female tourists were raped (one mexican lady was spared) while the seven male were tied up. Considering Acapulco was once quite popular to tourist, now it's reputation was tarnished due to violence.

I feel sad coz Acapulco was also included in my dream list of places I wanted to visit coz I read a travel magazine when I was young and I was fascinated how beautiful and extravagant it looks like. Now am scared coz am no longer sure about the safety of tourists who's going to stay there.

Anyway, I need to save money if I really wanted to pursue my plan of having a summer trip this year.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

new color

New year, new me!

This is quite a bit late change for me but what can I do? Salon is overbooked I only manage to squeeze myself for yesterdays sched.

It took a long journey before I reach that salon. Almost an hour ride in metro and quick taxi trip. It's not the nicest salon but they manage to give the services not badly as what I've read in the reviews (I bought the services pack in cobone). 

Had keratine treatment (which smells awful), full coloring (I asked for darkest shade which is blue violet but turned out a bit reddish wtf), gold mask (which I got several breakouts when I got home) and hair trim (for this one, I got a very poor service as I don't think the lady who trims my hair knows how to properly trim). Overall, I still find the finish product good but so smelly.

Am actually excited for tomorrow as I badly wanted to wash it. Don't care even if the instruction says after three days. Geez, my hair feels so heavy, lumpy, and smelly. Eeewww!

I think I spent seven hours in that salon. And coz of that, I missed Gab's birthday party :(

I was in metro when I got a call from Jaq that Anna got rushed in the hospital so I don't need to go there. I'm actually planning to go to the hospital but I don't know where so I just decided to go home.

Since I'm not in the rush, I tried all the public transpo that day - metro and bus. Going home, I literally ran for the bus as am still far from the bus station when I saw the bus coming near. Maybe I look like a crazy running lady but I actually don't care. Bus is full but luckily I manage to squeez myself inside.

Unfortunately, when I come down, I didn't see the sidewalk humps and I tipped and fell on my knees in front of the bus where all the people saw me (inside and going inside). Mia was also in the same bus helped me to get up and had this mix emotion of laughing and feel sorry for me. She was too kind to like carry me but I told her am perfectly fine and we started to laugh. Well well, am still lucky I didn't got serious injury from that fall aside from a large bruise on my left knee. And luckily, I was wearing jeans. Coz if am wearing shorts, I dunno what will happen to my knee.

Since I missed the 8:30pm bus, I decided to go with my pizza cravings and bought a box in Papa Johns. I was in a real hurry so when the staff told me that solo size is not available, I didn't hesitate to go for the double. And when she asked if I wanted the meal for two package, I just said yes and asked to prepare it as quickly as possible. She said she will try to have it ready by 20mins max. I got worried coz I don't want to miss the bus again but I don't have any choice but to wait. While waiting, I remember my voucher that will expire the next day so I just bought some headphones and memory card. Then I came back exactly 20 minutes later to get my pizza. I just realized that their cheesesticks was as big as the pizza that I ordered wtf! So it's like I have two boxes of pizza, not only good for two but three I guess. 

So when I reached the flat, dunno if my flatmates were there so I started eating it. I only managed to eat four slices of pizza (what a shame :( ) and the rest were set aside in the fridge. 

I got so full and watched movies the whole night. I watched "the hunger games" and there was this one part that I got surprised I wasn't able to supress my scream (sorry dear flatmates). Then this new flatmate came and couldn't open her room's door and had to ask me to open it like their door is different from other doors wtf. It's not like am being a bitch but hello? Commonsense where are you? If key is not working, you have to decide whether to knock and risk of waking up your roommate or call housing staff to open it for you as I don't have any special abilities to open the lock of other doors.

Anyway, I feel bad afterwards as I promised myself to be nice from now on. Uh oh.

Btw, I saw the Ntrust link my brother in law sent to me and it's a nice video. It's about their company's raffle contest winner. Surprisingly, this kinda motivate me to use mine. Haha..

Here's the link just in case anyone like to view it:

Tata for now!

Friday, January 18, 2013

holy moly!

Next week I will be on CTC training (sun, tues & thurs) which I suddenly realized a wrong decision of mine as these are the days that am so fucking busy.

Well, since am already got nominated and got included in the list, there's no turning back.

They sent me the docs to fill out I think three days ago but ignored it thinking it's just some kind of questionnaire I can fill out later. Last night before I went home, I remember about it and hastily printed it without reading as am planning to work on it during weekends.

Today I took it out of my bag and to my horror, I saw that aside from the questionnaire, there is this one form were I need to answer it together with my manager and under it, it needs to be signed by both of us. Uh oh.

Here comes my dilemma. I already advised my manager that I'd go directly to ICRS on Sunday since am planning to take the 9am bus (I can sleep more and wake up later). I don't want to pass by in the office just to get his signature as I don't want people to see me. But I seriously don't want to show up in the training room without it as it is some kind of a sign of being irresponsible.

So am currently devising a plan what to reason out why I don't have the signed form.
  1. I forgot to bring the signed form as I left it in my drawer
  2. I wasn't able to get my manager's signature as we were so so busy last week
  3. Pass by in the office quickly and get Nabil's signature

I have one more day to think. I need to decide quickly tomorrow the latest. Oh god, my brain is suddenly fried!

Oki, one pic I found from the departmental lounge fb site:

 our group shot - the first batch of departmental trainers ^_^ (though I look so fat and wasted during this day)

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

the secret

I feel thankful right now. And I feel positive over things.

I'm not sure if many have noticed but last week and previous previous previous weeks, I've been feeling so negative I couldn't see the beauty of the world anymore. I've been clouded by so much darkness I couldn't comprehend what's the best thing to do anymore (kinda exaggerated but it's true).

Then last Friday while waiting for Jackie, I passed by in the bookstore to look for some books as I wanted to go back to my old habit of reading an actual book and not an ebook. On the corner I saw the book "The Secret". I know I know, I'm a late bloomer again but I actually known this book since last year but I'm just being a kuripot to buy one for myself. I even practiced doing it and it works. So I can say this is quite effective in some ways.

Since I'm being so negative, I decided to buy this book to atleast enlighten myself. And I can say, it works.

Before, you will never see me smiling anymore in the office. And people began asking me the same question over and over again, "are you okay?" that it irritates me more to no end. And effect is no good.

But after I started reading this book (I'm still halfway reading it), I'm trying to get rid of anything negative in my mind. I saw one funny picture in facebook and I screenshot it (since I cannot save pictures when I'm using mobile fb) and save it in my computer in the office so whenever I feel that I'm feeling irritated, I'll just look into that picture and instantly, I want to burst out laughing.

This is one of the lessons I got from the book. What you think, your thoughts attracts things. You are a big magnet. So if you're thinking negative, bad things will happen to you. But if you think of positive things, good things will happen to you.

So last Sunday when I came to the office, I only think of good things and it started to enlighten my day. Some even say that my aura is so different from last time they saw me. They even told me whatever I did during the weekend I should always do so I will remain my good aura. So I promise myself, from now on, I will continue to do this.




I decided my New Year's resolution:
  • I will save money
  • I will try to fulfill my dreams of going to the cities I've always wanted to go to (Tokyo, Paris, London, New York and Santorino, Greece)
  • I will smile and be more friendly
  • I will stay positive no matter what happen
  • I will be always thankful in everything that I have

Though I wanted to add more, I think these are my top resolutions that I wanted to do. No need to write a long list when at the end of the year I will not be able to even fulfill even one.

So, tata for now! :D